March 9, 2009
Meghan McCain Is A Tool

Posted at 5:14 pm, in: Uncategorized

It is easy to be a gay-marriage supporting, Barack Obama-loving, Prius-driving, welfare-advocate. Just remember this, Miss McCain, your father flirted with the media, too. And, as we all saw when it came to election time and he was nominated on the Republican ticket, all of a sudden his “mavericky” hipness seemed to fade from their minds.

You remind of that dork in high school who was always trying too hard to fit in with the cool kids. There you are doing their homework for them and they pretend to be your friend. Then, they invite you out for that Friday night party just to play a prank on you, give you some awful nickname that will haunt you for life, and kick you out of the circle.

I’m waiting to see you on an episode of Maury ten years from now where you bring back the boy who wouldn’t kiss you to tell him how over it you are. Except, you’re obviously not over it because if you were you wouldn’t be concerned with bringing the guy on Maury and telling him about it.

The rebels are the edgy ones, always have been. Right now, conservatives are the rebels. It has always been “hipper” to stand alone than to be lost in the crowd. It’s too bad you don’t know that. You are trying to be a nonconformist in the most conformist way, like the eighteen year old that gets a tramp stamp or a bellybutton ring.

Just looking at your picture, with your oh-so-hip fedora (you’re just like Lindsay Lohan!), tells me all I need to know. You’re a tool.

Thanks my peeps for the inspiration: The Other McCain, Jimmie at Sundries Shack, Donald Douglas,and With Bias.