September 24, 2009
Why do good restaurants serve breakfast all day long? Without bacon, that would be impossible.

Posted at 2:54 pm, in: Uncategorized
Tags: Fat Tony, Point of a Gun, The Simpson, Trak-A-'Crat, Troglopundit

OK, I was over at Trak-A-’Crat, one of my favorite blogs (Simpsons reference alert: Fat Tony quote coming) “for cracking me so consistently up,” reading about Obama’s redistribution fever, when I stumbled onto this story from a couple months back about a fat kid’s mother being charged with neglect because her son was disgustingly morbidly obese:

Oh.

My.

God.

I only wish that I could’ve found a video of the whole 555 pounds of 14-year old Alexander Draper in motion.

Although… would he fit into the viewfinder? Wouldn’t you need a super-wide angle lens or summin’?

The Blob is in the news because his mother, Jerri Gray, has been charged with criminal neglect.

Watch the vid and listen to the amazing stream of self-delusion from the mother.

Quote: “A lot of times I had to work full-time second shift or full-time third shift and I wasn’t home a lot. There were times that I would have to purchase, you know, maybe some fast food when I came in.”

Some fast food?!

He ate nothing but fast food! Look at him!

And listen to the BS from the lawyer!

The child does not particularly like sweets. Yes, he does, he loves them!

He was eating several lunches each day at school. No sh*t!

There were also friends who were giving him snacks. What, like feeding an animal in the zoo?

Being hideously unhealthy is not a crime, though it is robbing Alexander of his childhood. The mother should not go to jail for this – that will only make the son’s life even worse.

But just wait until Barry’s forced health care plan comes into effect, for you and I will pay for every operation that Alexander “deserves” in order to counter his self-inflicted condition.

(PS – Rumor has it that the Troglopundit is nearly this fat…)

And, as I’m reading all of this–and, getting a good chuckle out of it, of course–I get an email about the greatness of bacon:

Friends, Pig Farmers, Countrymen. No fortune is too great to be sacrificed for the bellies of the porker. When the pig has done nothing but played in the mud and gorged itself so we can have one of the world’s most perfect food. How perfect is it? Why do the good restaurants serve breakfast all day long? Without bacon, that would be impossible. That is the power that bacon holds.

Looks like all of the stars aligned on this one.